chapter 13 - LOTF
RELIVING NIGHTMARES-
Ralph was now looking back at the island, the lord of the flies, up in flames. His wounds didn’t hurt in comparison to the way his eyes felt. Passing out was the last thing Ralph wanted right now. If only he could share this private moment with his dear friends Simon and Piggy. Oh how much he would trade to have them back with him again. Ralph was all alone now. He had to confide in himself, keep his mind shut off from the outside world, and ask no questions but the ones that were necessary. He looked back from over his shoulder to see poor Percival in such a lousy condition, which concerned Ralph very much. He wanted to comfort him but didn’t know if he could handle being human and walking over towards him. Ralph looked around to see if any of the other boys would notice him going to Percival’s side. Ralph got up slowly from his place on the deck, and over to where Percival was mumbling something unintelligible to himself. Ralph took his time to make his way across the small empty space between him and Percival, holding his small blanket that the Naval Officer and his men provided to all the boys. Ralph took his blanket off and put it around Percival’s shoulders, for he only had his blanket wrapped tightly around his legs and feet. The littluns, who made it on ship, were quiet for once and didn’t look as though they planned to speak any time soon, but peered their eyes up to see Ralph putting the blanket around Percival. Percival looked up at the sudden touch of blanket on his shoulders and chest.
“Wha- what you do-doin’ Ralph?” He asked Ralph, stuttering over some of the words because of how cold he was. Percival seemed confused as to why Ralph had just covered his shoulders and back with his own blanket. Ralph returned the expression equally confused but then found a way to respond casually and his expression went back to normal.
“Percival, it’s ok if you’re scared or afraid. I’m scared too.” Ralph looked around to see the Naval Officer talking to one of his men. “I just want you to know that we are going to get home.” After Ralph said the words, he wished he hadn’t said them. What if they weren’t going to get home? What if Ralph just promised something that he knew might not be true? Ralph’s expression turned remorseful. He tried to look away from Percival’s wondering eyes.
“What-s-s wro-ong Ral-ph-ph?” Ralph couldn’t hide the fear that he had his eyes anymore. He turned to Percival and lied once again.
“Don’t worry Percival. Were going to be fine.”
“No we won’t Ralph.” Ralph looked up at him. Ralph could tell that he had the same worries as him.
“Percival” Ralph said with his eyes closed. His mind was wandering. Going back to what they just lived through. All the deaths, the struggles, the pain, the thunder. The thunder… Ralph lost all consciousness and his eyelids won him over. Flashes of the boys’ life on the island, passed through Ralph’s head. One by one. Simon getting stabbed, Piggy getting crushed, himself hiding in the creepers. The thunder storms, the darkness, the solitude. Nothing in the dream was in order or in specific detail. Chanting while the cold rain poured onto their skin, the blood that covered his hands when we pulled his hand away from his wound, “Kill the Beast!” The thought of his mom and his dad being at home; wondering if he was running through their thoughts of worry. Being afraid and alone. “KILL THE BEAT! CUT HIS THROST! SPILL HIS BLOOD!” Ralph’s body was twitching vigorously and drenched in sweat. His eyelids flew open and his breath stirred to a pant. Percival was hovered over Ralph shaking him.
“Ralph! Ralph!”
With his mouth still open, and his breaths still in a pant, he softly said to Percival, “Storm.” Ralph’s eye wandered up past Percival’s darkened eyes, to stare up at the grey sky that surrounded them. It came to Ralph’s realization that they were on a boat with men they didn’t know, but trusted without much question as to where they were headed. Ralph was just pleased to get off the island, which he forgot all about being a civilized person. Ralph was right. There was a storm coming. Something bad was coming, and he felt it pulse through every nerve of his body.
Percival had drawn attention to Ralph which had all the boys scrambling to come to Ralph’s side; all but one boy. An imaginary one, that Ralph pictured in his head. A red haired one, whose plan to murder the boy now lying on the floor. Ralph looked over to see his fuzzy silhouette of Jack sitting in the middle of the winds path making it seem like he was so brave and strong.
“Hello?” Ralph called to the boy he thought was Jack.
All of the boys around him just looked at him as if he was serious. Percival just stared at Ralph’s body, which was now inclined a little bit towards the empty deck space he was now talking to. The boys couldn’t understand why Ralph was talking to an empty area. All the boys that came on bored were around Ralph. Why could he only see Jack?
“Will you answer me?” Ralph asked again. This time the blurred image in Ralph’s head that took the shape of Jack did not turn. Ralph took a deep breathe still looking at the sky when Percival took Ralph’s shoulders again and shock him intensely.
“Ralph. Ralph!”
Ralph looked up at Percival confused. “Where’s Jack?”
“Ralph… He stayed on the island with Roger and Bill. They wanted to stay. They did stay, Ralph.” The way Percival said it, it was as though he was confessing a terrible confession or saying something that was unforgivable. Ralph turned his face back away from Percival and the rest of the boys. Ralph thought about all of the dangers with that island. The flames burned the pupils of his eyes and burnt back the tears before they could leak out. Percival pushed everyone away and then went to lay back down, his back towards Ralph’s side. Ralph lay there trying to understand why he just saw Jack if he was on the island and what it was supposed to mean. Was Jack in trouble? Why should Ralph care.
*****
Back on the island, Jack, Roger, and Bill, had all split up by what had just happened. Jack ran towards the waters edge and looked back at the island that was now up in flames. What had he done? He didn’t know where Bill or Roger had gone, but only knew that there were only two solutions to where they could be; either hiding somewhere in the jungle that isn’t burning, or getting chased like a fish in an ocean of sea serpents by the flames. Jack just stood on the beach, watching while a cordon of flames took over the field of grass in front of him. The brown dirt began to turn dry and brittle in a matter of seconds and Jack found himself panting on the sand, gasping for clean air. On the opposite side of the beach, in a distance, he saw Roger’s blackened face, pop into view. Roger was on the verge of being dead, the smoke tint on his face made that clear.
Jack shouted over the snapping of braches and the crashes of trees, “Where’s Bill!?” All he saw were Roger’s hands come up to about shoulder length, and palms up. Roger had lost track of him too even before the Naval Officer came to rescue the boys off the island. Jack looked over his shoulder to see the ship that Ralph was on, and now regretted not getting on the ship that was now going back home to where his family was. He was sure that he was going to die at any moment. The flames came nearer and dearer to where he was bent over, coughing due to the amount of smoke around him. Jack’s vision was getting duller and fainter, to the point where Rogers body was just a faint speck. Jack backed up towards the ocean and closed his eyes hoping that the burn would go away. Roger was by his side, with the same stance as him, back arched and his finger pinching his eyes shut.
“Jack!!”
Jack had backed up into the ocean, now going below waist deep. Roger just realized this now, that his eyes were open, free from the burning sensation on his pupils. Roger, as weak as he was at the moment, he made an effort to go and rescue his fellow friend, and leader. The smoke layer now embedded once again on his eyes, stung from the contact of the salt in the ocean.
“Jack!” Roger cried out. “Stay with me! Where are you? I can’t see anything! Jack!”
Jack’s legs were giving out on him. ‘No not now!’ Jack thought. His lungs were filled with smoke and slowly filling with water. The blackness of the dirt was washing out of Jacks hair. The, now, orange hair floated at the top of the oceans levels, flowing along with the crashes of waves and the grey clouds of thunder. The reflection of the burning island was a perfect fit with the way Jack hair floated swiftly, from side to side. Jack was loosing consciousness now, but from underneath the waves, was a silent song coming from God’s spoken words. The waters sang to Jack in his ears and the burning hair was now sinking deeper and deeper along with the body that it was attached to. ‘Come on Jack! Pull yourself up! You need air!’ Jack thought to himself. His final act upon leaving this world, of anarchy and distress, was to motion the sign of the cross against his chest. ‘Goodbye Roger. I’ll meet up with you soon again.’ Piggy’s glasses that were attached to his waist, floated up to the top of the surface.
“Jack,” Roger screamed. Roger’s arms were too weak to continue but the water was getting to him as well. “JACK!” Roger made attempts to keep himself afloat, but he had no other choice than to die here in the same waters that took the blood of Simon, Piggy, and Jack, or to die on the island that ate the blood of a Wemy Madison boy, and Bill. He reached the point where Jacks legs failed and decided that he would leave the world with the same tradition as his dear friend Jack; the sign of the cross was a proper way to ask for forgiveness and goodbye. Letting the water creep slowly up his lungs, he gave his final goodbyes to life he once lived. The orange waters were going to have one more addition to their list of lives they took.
*****
Ralph was sweating rapidly again and was rolling from side to side. “Jack! Stay with me! Where are you? I can’t see anything,” he muttered. “Jack!” His eyes flew open and, again, Percival was over him shaking him.
“What is it Ralph. What happened?!”
Ralph was going back through the nightmare that he just dreamt and relived it horrifically. What was happening to him?
He dreamt as though he was there, gasping for air under the crashing waves, and hearing the waves sing to him. He dreamt as though he was the one reaching for surface sunlight and watching the orange hair disappear underneath the current. “Jack.” Ralph panted. He stood up without hesitation and ran over to the side of the boat.
Orange hair was floating at top of the calm ocean right besides the boat along with the exposed back of the red haired boy; Jack. Ralph dove off one of the benches that lined the side of the boat. The splashes of the waves brought everyone to his attention. The Naval Officer and the boys looked down at Ralph to see him diving for the dead corpse in the water. Ralph picked up Jacks body out, as far as he could, of the water and called to the men on the ship, “Give me a hand will you?” The boys helped Ralph lift Jacks body over the side of the boat and then helped him, up too, after getting Jack safely onto the deck.
“Son, who is this boy?” The Naval Officer asked.
“Ralph,” said Percival, astounded by what Ralph had just done. All of the other boys couldn’t believe what they just saw either. One of the boys got Ralph’s blanket and covered him with it before he could get sick from the cold.
“How did you know?” “Yea! How did you know?” All the boys threw these questions at him all at once.
“I really don’t know,” said Ralph. “I was having a really bad nightmare and… and…” Ralph couldn’t admit that fact that he felt like he was the one drowning.
“What is it Ralph?”
“..I felt as though something was wrong. Like… I pictured my self as him.” Ralph chocked on the last word. As he said this, his eyes and head looked at Jack lying there on the cold floor of the deck, and couldn’t remember why he let him stay there on the island. His face wasn’t like what he remembered it looking like, the last time he was on the island. This time Ralph noticed that it was darker and that his eyelids were turning the slightest bit purple.
“You know this boy?” Asked the Naval Officer. His eyes looked piercing but Ralph wondered if he only meant good.
“Yes,” Ralph looked around. “We all do.” Ralph hesitated looking at Percival, wondering if it was safe to give information. “He was one of our friends that got stuck on the island; one of the ones who survived the plane crash that we were all in.” Ralph saw Percival look away as though afraid to admit something or just worried he had said too much.
“How many did you say died?” Ralph looked over at Percival and remembered that his cousin, the birth marked boy, was the first one to go.
“Three. But now it appears as though four, but who knows what happened to Roger or Bill.” Ralph looked back up from Jacks dead body and Percival’s hung head. Did he just give out to much information?
“Well... I guess since this lad was your mate, we better give him a goodbye before letting him go. Someone get him a blanket.” On of the taller, skinnier, men on his boat stopped staring at Ralph and Percival and got up to get a blanket to put over Jacks body and face. All the boys and the boat men, all gave a moment of silence to Jack Merridew, a true leader, and inside, a true civilized human being. All that got to him was insanity and the true Lord of the Flies.
Each of the littlun’s and the bigun’s that were aboard the ship took Jacks wrapped body and gently scooped him up into their arms. Silently walking over to the side of the boat, they lowered his body to the surface of the water and let go as smoothly as possible. They all watched as Jacks body sank deeper and deeper into darkness as their ride home continued to sail on.
All it was, was the Lord of the Flies. Nothing else, and Ralph could see Jack so clearly because he was becoming the next Lord of the Flies. He was going to be the new Roger and Jack. No… This isn’t the boy that just admitted himself to being the slightest bit delusional, but the boy who had big dreams to be successful as he could in life, for he had to start anew.
His beloved friends Piggy and Simon, being his motivational strength and sunshine, for he needed it to be sunny right this instant, and Percival and his cousin for opening their hearts to him.
Goodbye Jack. I’ll meet up with you when it’s my time. I won’t let you down. Like you said, “Let’s be moving. We’re wasting time.”
